how to pull the plug on negative thoughts
Last night I went out with a good friend. We got dinner, went to an amazing concert (Jon Batiste!), and had some meaningful conversation. Objectively speaking, it was a pretty great time.
But then I got in my car for the long drive home…
Before I even left the parking lot, critical thoughts started flooding my brain. As I sifted through various moments of the preceding hours, I found myself nitpicking things I had said or done, and by the time I got home all the joy of the evening had been overshadowed by, well, shadows.
I’m happy to say I’m on the other side of those shadows now. More on that in a moment. But first, this…
Negative thoughts aren’t something we can avoid, but we CAN choose whether to agree with them.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Just yesterday, in fact, I was considering how we can identify the “unholy” agreements we make with lies and negative thoughts. And then this came to me:
UNHOLY agreements are powered by FEAR
HOLY agreements are powered by LOVE
Notice the phrase “powered by”. Taken literally, I imagine an actual power outlet I am plugging my mind, will and emotions into. To keep from drowning in negative thoughts we literally have to pull the plug FROM the outlet of fear, and plug it INTO the outlet of love.
Choosing to plug into love is an ACTIVE, not passive, choice.
Left to chance, most of us will tend to keep ourselves plugged into the fear outlet. That’s just a simple fact of our human condition. But every time we notice ourselves caught in the swirl of negativity and fear, we get to choose again.
For those who believe in Jesus, key elements of this choice can include reading scripture, praying, and/or listening to worship music. But sometimes a little more “risky” action is also required.
That’s what I did this morning.
If you’ve been around my work for any time at all you’ve probably heard me talk about the power of “closing the loop.” This is one of the very best ways to pull the plug on fear and put it back into the love outlet, because love is relational and most of our fears have to do with losing relationships that matter to us.
So this morning I reached out to the friend I was with last night and told her some of the things I was worried about. She reassured me of what my brain knew was probably true but my heart needed to hear her say, and then she prayed for me.
That prayer—and the kind and understanding way she responded to my vulnerability—literally felt like love in action. I couldn’t have experienced that level of love without our person-to-person interaction.
Seven minutes later the weight was lifted, and here I am now sharing this story—and this tool—with you.
Whatever negative thoughts you woke up with this morning, I encourage you to pull the plug out of the FEAR outlet today and plug it into LOVE. And if Jesus leads you to risk sharing your internal dialogue with another human you know is FOR you, I’m here to say it’s worth leaning into that challenge.
Cause we’ve all got more important things to do than wrestling old lies dressed in new clothing.And we remember:
For TRUTH…
- cr
